Aspirations

 

I’m in the 9th grade now and I’m at the point where you could consider me a young adult. I have to consider career options that are to my liking in one way or another, whether it is my passion, talent, or it is just done for the money. Many would pick the money, but in my opinion your passion for the subject is most important. I am someone who believes in helping people, even if it means putting someone else before me. Because I know what it is like to be stressed by skin conditions and inflammation. My true passion is in the medical field, specifically dermatology. When following this dream, money is not as important to me and I don’t have the proper experience now, but I believe the talent and money will come. Of course the job isn't the only thing about the career, the location and the style of running the clinic is important as well. I want to move to Indiana when I’m older, and I have wanted to do that for a long time. It's where my mother grew up and where I want to be. Also, I must decide whether I want to run my own office, or work for another. Based on my skills I can be a team leader with forgiveness, which can be good if I want to own my own office and be the boss.

 

Aspirations Rewrite Review

I looked at my work for this piece and saw that it just needed overall adjustment. I liked the information I put in the piece, but the way it was organized was actually really poor. In part of my original piece for this, I started trailing off talking about the Colts and Pacers, when just talking about the location of my business. I cut out the unnecessary parts and added little parts to make the piece sound smooth.